Look at the shoes you’re wearing. Your two shoes go together, they match. No one can say that they don’t. Even if you lose one and leave it behind in the road, they are still a pair of shoes. Now tie them together, one to the other. Go ahead. Now…

Every problematic situation needs an escape plan. Escapes that are not planned tend to go awry, so plot your exit strategy beforehand. These are the elements of an escape plan to consider when a loved one has hurt you. What would trigger the escape? The most important part of any exit strategy is figuring out…

If a grizzly bear wandered into your home while you were asleep, slipped into bed beside you, and woke you up with its hot breath in your face, what would you do? I think you would plan your escape. You might not run right away. The bear might seem friendly…

Not everyone makes it all the way to reconciliation. You can’t get there alone. If your partner has not done his part, you’ll have to settle for Personal Peace. Personal Peace is nice; but, because it’s personal, you can’t share it. If you have done your part to arrive at…

Once addiction has got a good hold on you, it doesn’t stop there; it looks for others it can infect with madness. In you, it has established a home base from which it can make forays into others, as if its whole purpose is to spread evil, corruption, and despair. …

If you’re hurt by someone you love, it’s important to get real about the injury and account for all the damages inflicted: your money the compulsive gambler spent, the trust the adulterer squandered, the confidence the abusive parent wrecked. It’s equally important to note the damages that were not done…

It is a good thing that compassion is a default setting. It may be the one fragile, fraying cord that binds us together. — The emotions could use some better PR. They have been blamed for everything from each personal crisis to the insanity that is called elections. We shrinks have mobilized the troops of rationality and have sharpened the swords of Stoicism, recast as Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, to do battle against these pesky…

If you effectively ask for your loved one to right a wrong he committed, you might find that he’s interested in what you have to say and will do everything he can to please you and become a better person in the process. He just might surprise you and change…